As I drove down I-65, all I could do was pray that this was the right thing to do. I prayed that God would just make it clear to me the path He had for me. I had finally become content with whatever He threw my way.
A loud sound caught my attention immediately. My first thought was that I had a flat tire. I remember praying, "God, there are other ways to get my attention other than a flat tire." I pulled over and looked around and found the luggage carrier on top of the car was a little loose. I wasn't too convinced that this was a sign as much as it was me being stupid and not strapping the thing down tight enough before I left the house. I ratcheted the strap down a little more, got back in my car and drove on.
I arrived at my exit and turned on Union. I drove over the river and through the S curve that entered what is officially downtown Nashville. It always amazes me to drive through downtown on the weekend. During the week, the area is full of people, lawyers and lawmakers, suspects and victims, guilty and innocent. The homeless walk by mostly unnoticed by those who see them everyday. But on the weekend, everyone seems to come down and look at what has been left behind. Photographers on corners take pictures of buildings. Tourists walk around admiring the architecture and stop to enjoy food and drink. And the homeless are still there, restless because they stick out like a sore thumb. During the week, they are invisible because of their familiarity, but on the weekends, they are noticed because of fear and judgemental minds.
I parked at 4th and Charlotte and walked up the street to the War Memorial Auditorium. Nashville has boxes at all of their intersections with speakers on them, piping in country music through the entire downtown area. The walk was filled with excitement and nervousness, I hardly even noticed the steep incline that ended at 6th Avenue. When I arrived at the Auditorium, a protest rally was in full swing. News cameras were all over the place. I was concerned that perhaps some were protesting the casting call. Weird, I know. Of course that was not the case. As I reached the top of the stairs, I noticed a line of people in a courtyard. These people were like me, and I knew that I was in the right place. I went over to the courtyard and found the people who were in charge of processing the hopes and dreams of hundreds of people waiting to prove themselves worthy of just a shot at being happy. I was one of those people, and I had a piece of paper that helped me reach my proving ground a little quicker than everyone else. The lady at the door welcomed me in and handed me paperwork to fill out. I sat down and started writing.
When I finished, I stood and waited for further instructions. The room was filled with lines of people. Excitement was in the air. Everyone was talking and laughing. I saw a couple of ladies dressed alike in Nashville Predators gear. I saw a couple of Indian guys wearing blue shirts and khaki shorts. My first thought was they worked at Best Buy, but I think they were making sure everyone knew they were a team. A guy came by and stood with me. He was a pretty big guy, not just weight but height as well. Being 6'4", I don't look up at a lot of people. This guy was easily 4 inches taller than me. We started talking, and we hit it off right away. I found out he was from Knoxville. "God's country," I said, "And home of the best football team in the nation." He gave me a fist bump and then pulled out a picture of a younger, thinner version of himself in a three point stance wearing the orange and white of the Volunteers. No wonder we hit it off so well.
Another guy joined us. He was from Nashville and had decided the night before to come out and try to realize his dream. He had won a pass off the radio the night before, and had left work early to stand in line with us. He was a college student and a security guard. He was in awe of the whole thing. We all started talking about the questions that may be coming our way. We spent the next hour filling the time with small talk and jokes.
A couple of guys joined our trio after about an hour. They were from South Carolina. I found out later that one of the guys was a contractor and his partner was a lawyer. Contractor looked a little nervous. Agitated, too. Lawyer was pretty friendly. He and I talked a little bit. I think the nerves got the best of all of us.
Another hour passed. The Dream Holders took a break and ate lunch. We stood waiting and watching. They started herding us again. Lines of people went into the room to prove themselves worthy, some rearranging started happening. Progress. We were getting closer. I started talking more and more with Volunteer. He and I had a lot in common. We had the same sense of humor. We actually talked about going in as a team. But as luck would have it, the Holders came out and asked for an individual, and Volunteer joined the lines for the next group in.
Security Guy started talking to the Best Buy guys. Lawyer and I started talking more. We started talking about rescue missions, which I have a lot of experience with. I talked about God's provision and how He has provided for us in these tough times. He talked about how he had seen that with a rescue mission in the town he was from. I could tell Contractor was a little uncomfortable with the conversation. Lawyer enjoyed it, though. We started talking about needs in the cities we are from. We talked about entitlement and religion. I started talking about relationships and Christ. It was awesome.
Another hour passed, and I started questioning the meaning of V.I.P. That is what my pass said. I thought it meant Very Important People. Apparently, the Dream Holders thought it meant Very Intense Patience. Having 6 kids, I already had it, so I was good. They brought more people into the Proving Room. We moved up. We were finally at the door. The nerves were at a peak now. A lot of nervous converations started going on. Security Guy and the Best Buys were cutting up. Another couple of people joined our group as we waited. They were both from near Memphis. The guy was a coach from Bartlett, the lady was from Dyersburg. We talked a little bit, but they didn't seem too interested in talking with me. The Best Buy guys were in charge of the back of the line, and they had everyone's attention.
I decided to listen to them, and they had some interesting stories. One of them had tried out for every season of the Biggest Loser. He had even made it to the Final Interview, just steps away from the Promised Land. The Powers That Be decided he was not ready, so he was not let in. Dyersburg had tried out before, she even had a call back for an on camera interview, only to be banished to the Land of No Further. I, too, know what it is like to wander in the deserts of the Land. I tried to pass these gates before only to be turned away at the entrance. I didn't even get to look inside.
Our time had come. It was time to visit the Dream Holders. They alone had the power to get us through. They alone held the ears of the Powers That Be. It was only through them they we could reach the goal we all wanted to achieve. They sat us at a table and asked us to briefly give a history of who we were, what we did, how much we weighed and how much we wanted to lose. Everyone gave their stories. I was the last to speak. I intentionally planned it that way so I could leave an impression, perhaps do a little more talking. They then asked us why? Why now? Why did we want to change? Everyone gave their answer, nothing real heartbreaking or devastating. I gave my reasons, which I have written here time and time again, to be obedient to God, I must get this part of my life straightened out, how can I help others when I don't get myself straight? The Head Dream Holder seemed interested, he even asked me where I lived and how far that was away from Nashville. I thought that was encouraging. Our time had expired, and it was time for us to leave. The Dream Holders had others to judge, our time had passed.
I walked back to my car, the events of the afternoon playing out before me. The last thing they said to us before we left was, "If you have been chosen, you will be given a call back by 9 this evening." I had spent the past four hours waiting, now I had five more ahead of me. V.I.P. does mean Very Intense Patience. As I walked down to my car, I saw that I had parked at a building that prints Sunday School material. I didn't even realize it. I don't remember the exact phrase because I was in a hurry to get to my car, but it said something to the effect of, "Lessons from the past to mold the future." I liked it. I meant to go by and take a picture of it, but I forgot.
I got to my car and turned my cell phone on. No callback yet. It had only been ten minutes. I didn't leave the killer impression that I had hoped. I drove back to my mom's house hopeful that I found favor in the eyes of the Dream Holders. I felt confident. I walked in to my mom's house and told them what had happened. My sister is a friend of the someone that helped the Dream Holders. She texted her and she said I did well. I was feeling very optimistic.
Time slowly clicked by. Minute by minute. Hour by hour. No word from the Dream Holders. My optimism began to fade and I slowly came back to the Land of Reality. In this land, people have to work for what they want. There are no lottery winners, no Golden Tickets, no Passing Go and collecting $200. This is where real people live. This is where people earn tickets to the Promised Land, the land where the things they want live. I am a citizen of the Land of Reality, I cannot leave it. The Dream Holders made that loud and clear. They did not call to see me again. Banished from their presence forevermore, I returned to my homeland, content with the path that is laid out before me.
Dear NBC,
You just missed out on someone who can write poetically about the weight loss process. So guess what, I get to write a book, and this chapter will be the most amusing one. Thanks for giving me a chapter. No, I won't pay you royalties. Well, maybe if you let me be on The Office, but that would be the only reason.
Thanks,
Jeremy
Great Chapter!!
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